DISCLAIMER: This blog is being used to help me deal with the passing of our daughter Emelina, whom was delivered stillborn on Feb 21. These are MY feelings and I will not be sorry for having them.

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Thoughts and thoughts....

I sit here tonight waiting for my new scrapbook template to download...I was suppose to be creating a photo book but alas I sitting waiting for my computer to catch up. So while I wait I decided that it was time to do some posting before my life goes crazy.

So were are we....well our house has sold and I moved in with my friend J and we had no idea how long this would be........and last week I got not one job offer but two job offers, and the decision of where I was going to be working in Calgary was up to me...that has NEVER happened to me. So I decided on branch in the far far south east as it is an new branch that is set up very close to the type of branch I am presently working at.

I am having so many mixed emotions...up until now I am had something holding me in BC....house, work now I have nothing. I am so excited to be back with my family but honestly I rarely let myself even think about the fact that I am not with them, I am always waiting for the next trip.

But next week we will be all together with a new job, and a new life....I am not sure what is scarier, dealing with grief or moving to a new city and starting over....What I know is that I am going to miss my friend J and her FAMILY...especially a little girl who has honestly stolen my heart, she makes me laugh and watching her start walking makes me realize that even though I have been hesitate on whether or not to go though with another pregnancy that I honestly want another child around just do we do it through adoption or pregnancy....